There's a funny thing we, as humans, often do. We try to resist what is. We don't accept our lives as they are, and eventually we become resentful for things not turing out the way we expected, the way we planned.
Here's the thing, if we aren't happy or content with an aspect of our lives, we need to do something to change it, and change can not happen without intention and action. We need to recognize what's not working for us. But it's also important to accept where we are, as resistance only causes us grief, anger, resentment, and frustration. Which is fine to a point; sometimes this is what fuels change, however, if this is a constant state, something will eventually give.
On the flip side, if you are one who planned your entire life, but it did not go according to your plan, and you refuse to accept your life as it is, you simply can not enjoy it or appreciate it. You can't be completely happy living in resistance.
I was talking to a friend recently who appeared to have a lovely life. She had sweet children, a caring husband, and a great career, but she often spoke about how she thought she would be living somewhere else, and that she had only planned to have one child, not two. She would "complain" that life wasn't what she thought it would be, and it really bothered her, enough to talk about it quite frequently.
She was caught up in the fact that life had happened beyond her control, and that it had a plan of its own. Her ego was trapped in what should have been and she was unconsciously and consciously refusing to allow herself to accept the beautiful life she had. I shared with her the importance of acceptance, and how the more she resisted her life, the more she resented her life. I also spoke about gratitude and how life-changing it can truly be. When we are thankful for everything and everyone around us, it puts us in a state of peace and contentment, and takes us out of a state of constant need, want, and resistance.
I had my friend write a physical letter to the Universe and I suggested she write out every angry word she needed to get out of her system. Why she was angry, and how angry she was that her life was't what she expected and planned. I then had her shift emotions to acceptance and gratitude, thanking the Universe for her beautiful family, her amazing husband and her fruitful career. This "simple" act of writing the letter, completely released the resistance and deep upset she had held onto for so many years.
It changed everything for her. She found, and felt joy again.
Happiness can exist only in acceptance. – George Orwell
We need to remember that while we are in control of ourselves, we have no control over every outcome. We can't control what the Universe delivers to us and decides we need for our growth, and for our journey. If we can come to a place of acceptance, of every element cast upon us, and choose how we respond to each outcome, we can then find true peace within.
Acceptance simply means being okay with what is, embracing what is, and not giving time or attention to what isn't. Because what isn't, wasn't meant to be. We can end our own suffering when we accept with grace what life delivers to us. Understand the Universe is always supporting you.
Remember you aren't expected to accept circumstances that aren't healthy for you, or serving you purpose. If that is where you are, perhaps it's time to dig deep within your soul and recognize what needs to change and move forward with courage to make those necessary changes that your heart is asking for.
Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. – Lao Tzu